It’s me, Hayley. Yes, it’s been a while once again. I think the last time I wrote was at the beginning of the year? Since then, I’ve been on hiatus; taking time to re-ground, re-focus, re-direct my intentions towards other things. As you guys already know, my boyfriend and I of 3 years ended things at the beginning of the year. I know 3 years doesn’t seem like a whole lot, but I think that whether it’s 1, 10, or 100 years, you still centre all of your focus to the person you’re with and completely tune into your relationship. When that person is gone, you suddenly have nothing to focus on and you’re kind of lost for a bit. I guess what I’m trying to say is that my 2-month hiatus was time for me to find myself and focus my intentions on other things. It was my moment to completely turn-off and get back into the groove.
Today, April 29-30 is the full moon. What an amazing time to finally put my new-found groove to work and pick up where I left off and start writing again.
Just to get into a little amateur scientific knowledge for a second, the full moon is said to heighten mind activity. During a full moon (or new moon), the thought frequencies from our sub-conscious mind surface to the conscious mind. Therefore, on this level of the mind, we become aware of these thoughts. To break that down into stupid terms (don’t worry I need it too), the full moon can either increase your positive energy or it can spark total chaos on your emotions. Ya…definitely something I don’t need right now. So, because during this time the moon radiates an incredible amount of energy on us, you’re supposed to be in a calm state of mind in order to receive a positive effect. If you’re angry, you’ll feel angrier, but if you’re happy, you will feel happier.
As we transition into a new month, I’ve decided to soak in the full moon’s energy in a productive way and enter this new month in a positive state of mind. I’m finally off hiatus and slowly but surely back in the grind of blogging. I’ve settled things with my ex. We’ve hung out casually as friends with our friend group, and we’ve chatted here and there, so I’m really happy with that. I managed to get through my first semester of university AND pass all of my classes. Weird mixture of super smart person grades and smokes weed everyday person grades. For the most part, I’m pretty proud of myself. I got pretty decent grades for my first run at it.
I finally started taking care of myself again. I fell off the wagon for a bit. Definitely felt like a giant bag of turds. I’m back at the gym consistently, doing yoga more, eating healthier and more frequently, and washing my hair and wearing more than just one outfit a week. Can you see why I felt like a turd?
I spend more time with my friends and got much closer to a lot of them. This has been especially special to me because my friends all make my heart so happy and it helped me re-direct myself positively.
I started two new jobs, both of which I like a lot so far!
I re-decorated and re-arranged my room… I also decided to finally stop following clothing trends (a majority of the time they look like shit on me) and just wear whatever the fuck I wanted….so…I donated half my wardrobe to charity.
I started talking to strangers again. I know that seems super weird, but it’s secretly something I look forward to when I go in public.
Anyways, I could probably go on and on, but those are some of the forward steps I’ve been making for myself. I still have an incredibly active brain, but instead of dwelling on the past, I get excited about all the things to come!
And just because it’s the full moon doesn’t mean I’m all: “Yay positivity forever, no more negativity, love trumps all!” No….I know there’s going to be some shitty days. Shitty days are inevitable. If you don’t have a shitty day, you’re either full of shit, delirious, or not human. But amongst those turd-like days, I know there’s going to be some really good days!
To wrap it up, I am hoping for positive energy from the moon tonight to help me get back into the groove of life….and overall…living again!
Happy Full Moon everyone! I am sending you all good vibes as we transition into May!